The Vital Role of Fathering

‘And when Jacob had made an end of commanding his sons, he gathered up his feet into the bed, and yielded up the ghost, and was gathered unto his people’ (Gen 49:33)

As a father, you don’t have a right to die or leave the shores of this earth and go on to rest until you have finished instructing your children. ‘And when Jacob had made an end of commanding his sons, he gathered up his feet into the bed, and yielded up the ghost, and was gathered unto his people’ (Gen 49:33). Gordon Dalbey tells a story about a Catholic nun who worked in a men’s prison. One day, she said, a prisoner asked her to buy him a Mother’s Day card for his mother. She did, and the word got out to other prisoners, and pretty soon this nun was deluged with requests, so she put in a call to Hallmark Cards, who donated to the prison several large boxes of Mother’s Day cards. The warden arranged for each inmate to draw a number, and they lined up through the cellblocks to get their cards.

Weeks later, the nun was looking ahead on her calendar, and decided to call Hallmark again and ask for Father’s Day cards, in order to avoid another rush. As Father’s Day approached, the warden announced free cards were again available at the chapel. To the nun’s surprise, not a single prisoner ever asked her for a Father’s Day card. It is said that Mother’s Day is the biggest calling day of the year for the phone company. However, in terms of call volume, Father’s Day is like any other day of the week. Before his passing, Irving Kristol quoted the startling fact that "almost two-thirds of rapists, three-fourths of adolescent murderers, and three-fourths of long-term prison inmates were abandoned by their fathers. Another study revealed that 92% of prison inmates hated their fathers. There is definitely a fatherhood crisis in our time.

The Greek word for father is Pater. "Pater" is the root meaning "father" as in "paternity" and "patriarchy." Fatherhood does not end at giving birth to a child. A father’s role is to:

(1) PROTECT – Guard his children

Another word for a parent is a guardian, keeper, custodian or steward. A father is supposed to guard his family through prayer and wise counsel. Mat 12:29 teaches that an enemy cannot enter into a home until he binds the strong man. God blessed Ishmael based on Abraham’s Prayer (Gen 17:20). A father is supposed to Pray with his family but not only for his family. The family that prays together stays together. Another way to protect your children is to discipline them. Proverbs teaches that discipline does not kill children (Prov 23:13).

(2) GUIDE – Prune His children.

In 1 Sam 4 Eli the priest and both of his sons, Hophni and Phinehas died and the ark of covenant was also captured, all because Eli failed to guide his children and prevent them from partaking in the offering meant for the Lord (1 Sam 2:11-19). God’s word to him was "Why do you honor your sons more than me by fattening yourself on the choice part of every offering made by my people Israel" (1 Sam 2:29). Also it is a father’s responsibility to discover his children’s uniqueness and guide them into the fulfillment of their destinies. Jesse as a father to David did not even have an idea of David’s uniqueness and potential. There is a tendency today to speak of ‘carers’ rather than mothers or fathers. Many fathers and mothers have left their responsibilities in the hands of ‘carers’ so they don’t know their children themselves (Psalm 127:3,4).

(3) PROVIDE – Give good things.

‘Today, most families rely upon the incomes of both mothers and fathers. However, fathers still provide the lion's share of income. Fathers are either the sole earners or the main earners in two-thirds of two-parent households’ (Burghes, L., Clarke, L. & Cronin, N). In Mat 7:11 Jesus confirms the responsibility of fathers to provide, when He says ‘If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him’. A good man lives an inheritance for his children’s children (Prov 13: 22).